The TA Virus
In a very scary corona virus-based world right now, a much smaller, but still stressful virus is going around. It hits kids the hardest and then their moms. The main symptoms are stress, stomach aches, rapid heartbeat, family fighting and the common cold (caused by the stress). It is caught in those under eighteen through pressure and hope and fear, and caught in those over thirty through love for their kids. This virus comes on very strong in March, and for some it is healed quickly at the end of the month with positive results, and for others with negative results it can linger for weeks or months. Or even come up in therapy years later.
I am talking about the Tryout Audition Virus. TA for short.
TA is rampant right now. Our kids live in a very competitive world. When I was a teenager I could do the school play, sing in a choir, play a couple sports and still have time to play outside with my friends (gasp…kids did that?) and have family dinners. Today, teams and plays and choirs and clubs have very few spots for many talented kids. It breaks my heart, and has led me to my current TA virus.
I am extremely spiritual, I have complete faith in God and my Angels, I believe there is divine reason behind all things. So why do I still become completely stressed, pit in my stomach, want to scream, get a cold, eat a ton of junk food, every time my daughters have auditions or tryouts?
I have concluded it is a real thing that I get. A real virus. Real symptoms that take over me. Symptoms that cause my normal calm, spiritual self to become erratic and out of control. Symptoms that cause me to lead with my head instead of my heart and make it very hard to to STOP and calm myself. I am not alone.
This virus is here, right now, in full force this month of March, a month of spring tryouts and auditions. My household is a great ball of stress energy swirling to the point of us all bursting. All the year’s hard work, effort, training, practicing….it all culminates, it all gets answers this month.
While I wish it could be April tomorrow and all of this be over, I also know it’s something we must go through. A virus we have to fight. A learning experience. A reminder that no one said life is easy. I firmly believe and tell my daughters:
-If it’s meant to be it will be.
-You’ve worked so hard that if they chose on hard work alone you’d be number one.
-You’ve done every single thing you could do to get here and worked your butts off doing it, now show up and show them all you’ve got. The rest is out of your control.
-Trust the universe.
-You do YOU, don’t look at what anyone else is doing.
-No one knows what the coach/director is looking for except the coach or director.
And I while believe all of the above with my heart and soul, at the end of the day, it is the coaches, the directors, the teachers that make the decisions. Luckily, for me, the coaches, teachers and directors involved in my daughters lives right now are all wonderful. I trust them. I know their tryouts and auditions will be fair, I know they are good, caring people. My daughters love them. But this almost makes it harder, because if my girls don’t make their team or group, or get the places they want, they might even hurt more because they want to please these mentors so badly and want to work under them so much. You know how kids minds work if they are rejected by someone they look up to:
-She/he doesn’t like me.
-She/he didn’t see me do _______ or ________.
-She/he thinks “I suck.”
And at the end of tryouts and auditions, half the kids and moms will be cured of the TA virus, and half will still suffer through it. Because rejection is hard, cuts are hard, and not all the kids (or moms of kids) who make the team or get the part are gracious to those who don’t.
So, I look up to the sky, hands up and ask, “How do we get through these next few weeks? How do we fight this virus?”
And along with vitamin C, the answer I received is trifold: “With love, faith and deep breaths.”
Love: Because a little can go a long way.
Faith: Because I do TRULY believe in my heart that the universe/spirit will present the right end result for my girls.
Deep Breaths: because they help.
And while love, and faith and deep breaths might not be a cure to the TA virus, at least they are supplements that might help.
Best of luck to all you moms out there who are fighting the TA virus right now in your homes. My prayer is this for all of us:
May our children end up exactly where the universe wants them to be, for their soul’s journey; because despite my TA virus, I do know in my heart that they will.
Blessings and love,